We have all heard the horror/funny stories about people with crazy inlaws. My blog is to help you survive them or cause you to laugh your ass off. Options that have an * are scenarios that you should not do because they are mean so do so at your own risk. I will do one scenario each week. Feel free to contact me via email if you have any suggestions or survival stories. My email is firstname.lastname@example.org
Scenario 1: The Mother in law who makes snarky/sarcastic comments about your appearance or housekeeping skills. This has happened to me and I was not prepared for it.Now that I know I feel much more confident in dealing with her. Option 1: Smile and nod while she is talking while you are seething on the inside. While you are smiling think of all the horrible and evil things you would like to happen to her. Me personally, I prefer thinking of a house falling on her. I have to refrain from singing out loud the song Ding Dong the Witch Is Dead from the Broadway Play Wicked.
Option 2 is to retort in a teasing manner that you don't visit her and comment on her housekeeping skills or lack thereof. Doing so will probably irritate her or the comment will fly right over her head.
Option 3 is to medicate yourself with either prescription drugs or alcohol. DO NOT DO BOTH!! You could always make her an alcoholic beverage.
Option 4 is to fake a migraine or sudden illness and lock yourself in your room. This is the option that I go with. Migraines are easy to fake and no one will get mad at you if you suddenly disappear.
Option 5 is to fake running errands and leaving your spouse behind to deal with their parents. Stay gone for a few hours to ensure that they are gone by the time you come back. Ladies go shopping or get your nails done. Men I suggest you visit a sports bar.
*Option 6 is to resort to physical violence. This one I do not recommend due to added drama, assault charges, jail time and lawsuits. Plus it might make attending the next family event a little awkward.
On a personal note I lived with my inlaws for about eight months and I do not recommend it for anyone. However I am aware that there are situations that are beyond your control. I hope that some of these tips come in handy